Steak on the Eye?

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I was watching Don Matteo the other night. The protagonist receives a blow to one eye that leaves it raw and swollen. His housekeeper brings a steak out of the fridge... and he slaps it on the wound! Oy vey.

First of all, steak is good to eat... but not after its been on a raw sore. Even worse, though, is that the reason we cook steak is... bacteria. Uh-huh, nothing better for a raw sore than to have a festering boatload of bacteria pressed up against it. After the steak, Don, maybe try a baby's soiled diaper... or something like that.

The punctuational theme for this post is... ellipses.

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