The Toad Song
After me and twelve other chillun,
My pappy, who was a fatuous villain,
Said to my momma, go and get your tubes tied.
Momma said, shove it up your ass.
When I was three my momma done told me,
Son, she said, you was borned a toad.
Maw, I said, I allus knew I’s different,
Still I guess that’s a heavy load.
But I was young, so I got used to it,
Had a lot of fun,
Sittin’ in the swamp in the mud up to my ears
Growin’ warts and croakin’ in the noonday sun.
When I was seven I left home
‘Cause my pappy didn’t like to have a toad in the house.
Goodbye Maw, ain’tcha gonna kiss me?
Mamma said, shove it up your ass.
© 2008 by Walter Bloch, all rights reserved.